"Don't look now, but.........."
"My skip told me to put a plug in it."
"I've been growing this for three weeks and it's still itchy."
"I do wish these two would stop going on so.... and I can have some quality zzzzzzs'"
"Oh Dave, I just canna take it any more!"
"I'll just have un petit nibble."
Other captions are available. Can you do better. Pics by Bob.